Showing posts with label humor. Show all posts
Showing posts with label humor. Show all posts
Friday, February 3, 2012
Tuesday, December 13, 2011
Tuesday, September 13, 2011
Too cute
These two things are not connected in any way but they are too cute not to post:
To all the girls who are in a hurry to have a boyfriend or get married, a piece of Biblical advice: " Ruth patiently waited for her mate Boaz." While you are waiting on YOUR Boaz, don't settle for any of his relatives; Broke-az, Po-az, Lyin-az, Cheating-az, Dumb-az, Drunk-az, Cheap-az, Lockedup-az, , Goodfornothing-az, Lazy-az, and especially his third cousin Beatinyo-az. Wait on your Boaz and make sure he respects Yoaz.... Repost if it made you Smile:)
This one you have to click to watch it is amazing :)
To all the girls who are in a hurry to have a boyfriend or get married, a piece of Biblical advice: " Ruth patiently waited for her mate Boaz." While you are waiting on YOUR Boaz, don't settle for any of his relatives; Broke-az, Po-az, Lyin-az, Cheating-az, Dumb-az, Drunk-az, Cheap-az, Lockedup-az, , Goodfornothing-az, Lazy-az, and especially his third cousin Beatinyo-az. Wait on your Boaz and make sure he respects Yoaz.... Repost if it made you Smile:)
This one you have to click to watch it is amazing :)
Friday, June 25, 2010
Things To Ponder
I saw a woman wearing a sweat shirt with 'Guess' on it.
So I said 'Implants?'
She hit me.
How come we choose from just two people to run for president and over fifty for Miss America?
I signed up for an exercise class and was told to wear loose fitting clothing. If I HAD any loose fitting clothing, I wouldn't have signed up in the first place!
Don't argue with an idiot; people watching may not be able to tell the difference.
So I said 'Implants?'
She hit me.
How come we choose from just two people to run for president and over fifty for Miss America?
I signed up for an exercise class and was told to wear loose fitting clothing. If I HAD any loose fitting clothing, I wouldn't have signed up in the first place!
Don't argue with an idiot; people watching may not be able to tell the difference.
Monday, April 26, 2010
Mental Health Week
This coming week is National Mental Health Care week.
You can do your part by remembering to contact at least one unstable person to show you care.
You can do your part by remembering to contact at least one unstable person to show you care.
Well .. .. .
my job is done. Your turn!
Thursday, January 21, 2010
Sunday, January 3, 2010
Monday, August 17, 2009
The Answer Is Blowin' In The Wind
No I.D.? No clue who he was? Why??
Rock legend Bob Dylan was treated like a complete unknown by New Jersey police.
Dylan was in Long Branch, N.J., as part of a tour with Willie Nelson and John Mellencamp that was to play at a baseball stadium on July 23.
At 5 p.m. a resident called police to report a man looking at houses while wandering around a low-income neighborhood several blocks from the oceanfront.
A 24-year-old police officer appeared on the scene, asked Dylan his name, which didn't ring a bell, even though he said he was there on tour.
``I don't think she was familiar with his entire body of work,'' Long Branch business administrator Howard Woolley said Friday.
A second officer, also in his 20s, responded to assist the first one. He, too, apparently was unfamiliar with Dylan.
The officers asked Dylan for identification. The singer of such classics as Like a Rolling Stone and Blowin' in the Wind said that he didn't have any ID with him and that he was just walking around to pass time before that night's show.
The officers then asked Dylan, 68, to accompany them to the Ocean Place Resort and Spa, where the performers were staying. Once there, tour staff vouched for Dylan.
The officers thanked him for his cooperation.
``He couldn't have been any nicer,'' Woolley said.
Guess it's true. When you got nothing, you got nothing to lose.
Rock legend Bob Dylan was treated like a complete unknown by New Jersey police.
Dylan was in Long Branch, N.J., as part of a tour with Willie Nelson and John Mellencamp that was to play at a baseball stadium on July 23.
At 5 p.m. a resident called police to report a man looking at houses while wandering around a low-income neighborhood several blocks from the oceanfront.
A 24-year-old police officer appeared on the scene, asked Dylan his name, which didn't ring a bell, even though he said he was there on tour.
``I don't think she was familiar with his entire body of work,'' Long Branch business administrator Howard Woolley said Friday.
A second officer, also in his 20s, responded to assist the first one. He, too, apparently was unfamiliar with Dylan.
The officers asked Dylan for identification. The singer of such classics as Like a Rolling Stone and Blowin' in the Wind said that he didn't have any ID with him and that he was just walking around to pass time before that night's show.
The officers then asked Dylan, 68, to accompany them to the Ocean Place Resort and Spa, where the performers were staying. Once there, tour staff vouched for Dylan.
The officers thanked him for his cooperation.
``He couldn't have been any nicer,'' Woolley said.
Guess it's true. When you got nothing, you got nothing to lose.
Saturday, July 25, 2009
Take the money and run!
GREENACRES, Fla. (AP) - Authorities caught a Lake Worth man running down the street with a stolen cash register. Greenacres police reported that a 32-year-old man entered a restaurant Thursday afternoon and asked for change for a $10 bill. When the cashier asked to see the bill, the man reportedly began screaming, "I want change!"
Police said the man then grabbed about $40 from a tip box, picked up the cash register containing nearly $300 and ran out.
The officers who arrested the suspect after a short chase had just come from reviewing surveillance footage at a nearby connivence store, where lottery tickets had been stolen a day earlier. By chance, the officers identified the man as the thief from the footage.
The man was being held on $21,000 bail for multiple charges.
---
Information from: The Palm Beach Post, http://www.pbpost.com
Police said the man then grabbed about $40 from a tip box, picked up the cash register containing nearly $300 and ran out.
The officers who arrested the suspect after a short chase had just come from reviewing surveillance footage at a nearby connivence store, where lottery tickets had been stolen a day earlier. By chance, the officers identified the man as the thief from the footage.
The man was being held on $21,000 bail for multiple charges.
---
Information from: The Palm Beach Post, http://www.pbpost.com
Tuesday, June 23, 2009
Well-Planned Retirement
Outside the Bristol Zoo , in England , there is a parking lot for 150
cars and 8 coaches, or buses.
It was manned by a very pleasant attendant carrying a ticket machine
charging cars £1 (about $1.40) and coaches £5 (about $7).
This parking attendant worked there solid for all of 25 years.
Then, one day, he just didn't turn up for work.
"Oh well", said Bristol Zoo Management - "we'd better phone up the City
Council and get them to send a new parking attendant..."
"Err ... no", said the Council, "that parking lot is your responsibility."
"Err ... no", said Bristol Zoo Management, "the attendant was employed
by the City Council, wasn't he?"
"Err ... NO!" insisted the Council.
Sitting in his villa somewhere on the coast of Spain, is a bloke who had
been taking the parking lot fees, estimated at £400 (about $560) per
day at Bristol Zoo for the last 25 years. Assuming 7 days a week, this
amounts to just over £3.6 million ($7 million)!
And no one even knows his name
cars and 8 coaches, or buses.
It was manned by a very pleasant attendant carrying a ticket machine
charging cars £1 (about $1.40) and coaches £5 (about $7).
This parking attendant worked there solid for all of 25 years.
Then, one day, he just didn't turn up for work.
"Oh well", said Bristol Zoo Management - "we'd better phone up the City
Council and get them to send a new parking attendant..."
"Err ... no", said the Council, "that parking lot is your responsibility."
"Err ... no", said Bristol Zoo Management, "the attendant was employed
by the City Council, wasn't he?"
"Err ... NO!" insisted the Council.
Sitting in his villa somewhere on the coast of Spain, is a bloke who had
been taking the parking lot fees, estimated at £400 (about $560) per
day at Bristol Zoo for the last 25 years. Assuming 7 days a week, this
amounts to just over £3.6 million ($7 million)!
And no one even knows his name
Friday, March 14, 2008
Comic
I don't know why, but I just found this comic to be very humorous. So, I post it here for your enjoyment or dismay, the choice is yours. The picture does not seem to show in its entirety, so please, click on the cartoon and it will take you to the whole picture. Someday I will figure out how to get an entire picture to show on this blog! ha ha ha
Studkickass.com
Studkickass.com
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